Trump’s ‘Heartfelt’ Weekly Letter Addresses Gun Violence, Sessions’ Loyalty

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Despite his disappointing 90 percent approval rating, President Trump again took time to address his loyal supporters in print. Not everybody would do this, but not everybody is President Trump. In fact, nobody is.

THE WHITE HOUSE

Saturday, June 17, 2017, 3:48 a.m.

Dear Loyal Supporters!

Happy Saturday morning! I hope you had a great week and have a day of golf planned like I do. I mean if I can escape Camp David that is! If not golf, I hope you can do something that will get you out of the house and away from your loved ones and your problems. Not that I have any problems — I mean besides the lying, fake media and all these people who are out to get me because I won the election in a complete and udder landslide. They are very jealous of all my enormous success — very. Anyway, we all need our space sometimes, folks, which is also why I haven’t scene Marla for a few days.

Before I get into important, serious matters that effect me, I just want to say that I  am getting far more out of these terrific, heartfelt  letters than you are. And I want to thank you for that. It is important you hear what I have to say and in my own words. The best words, as I’ve told you. So you are very lucky.

I also want to make sure to thank my attorney Jeff Sessions for his powerful defense of me in front of the lying, corrupt congressmen at the Supreme Court Tuesday. As you know I demand loyalty. I expect loyalty. If I don’t get the loyalty I demand and expect, I fire people — just like I did in the award-winning, top-rated TV show that starred me. And so we’re clear I could have kept on doing that show while I was president, but I would not have had time for golf. And it is important I get that time away from loved ones as I have already told you. So thank you again for understanding. Oh, and I did not fire or demand loyalty from that fifthy crook, Comey. He lied about that. It is not how I operate.

Anyway, if it isn’t clear to you by now that Jeff adores and loves me, I guess I don’t know what to say. Maybe now we can put this silly, evil investigation to bed, and that traitor Muller can go back to his miserable retirement.

I also wanted to address why you haven’t scene Jared much lately. Well, he’s in the doghouse to be honest with you. I know, I know. But when I found out he might have been sneaking around more than I thought with the Russians, I put my foot down. So he is getting some tough love. You know, I would have made him my caddie except he has no shoulders! Joke there, and you know how much I like to kid. The other day I spilled my grape soda all over Rex, and said, “Just kidding!” Boy, you should have scene the look on his face!

It’s important you no that that is the kind of atmosphere I have created around the White House. Nobody nose when I am kidding and when I am being dead serious. Nobody nose this better than Rince who is a little terrified of me. But I know he loves me because he said so in the greatest cabinet meeting anybody had ever had. I hope you saw that. I mean, I new these people loved and adored me, but not that much. It was almost two much, but it wasn’t. It was enough.

And so you no, I don’t expect everybody to love me. That would be silly. Hannity tells me my approval ratings are stuck at about 90 percent. That’s still a little hire than Vlad’s, but I can do better. And I will. You will see. People who don’t love me now will. They better, anyway. That’s all I can say about that one right now. Well, I will say this, I have a very big, terrific surprise for them which I will announce later. Tune in for that. It will be fabulous.

Okay, so wear was I? Oh yes, Jeff. Just listening to how forceful he was I could see why the people in Mississippi loved him so. And that black girl who was screaming at him? SAD! I’m not sure who she thought she was, but that is not how you conduct yourself in the Supreme Court and I know Jeff was thinking that is NOT how you conduct yourself in Mississippi. I will be expecting an apology from her, or there will be very, very severe consequences. Believe me.

Finally I just wanted to mention the tragic, awful shooting. This is what happens when filthy liberals take to the streets. They should all be locked up. And with Hillary if possible. I mean who’s the idiot that allows people to run around with guns like this? It’s Obama that’s who. A guy who was not even born in our country. People who voted for me love their guns and would never shoot anybody unless they deserved it. Why, do you know how close I came to shooting one of you in the middle of 5th Avenue just to make some silly point before the election? But I didn’t, because I believe in the 2nd Amendment. I suggest you think about that. It’s a great point, and why I am glad to be your roll model.

But for now, thank you again, and enjoy your time on the golf course or anywhere else away from your loved ones.

Donald J. Trump

 

 

 

 

Written By

destephens

Lived everywhere. Started in Africa, then to America, then to Europe, then ... back to America, which lately seems to pride itself in going back. Almost made it 30 years in print journalism, before it all went bad. Really? Don’t think things are bad, eh? Who’s your new president, pal? How did that happen? Because it all went bad.

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