Trump: “OK, last offer before I hang up and call Vlad to report on this conversation. One hundred tanks, 1,000 bombs, 50 cases of vodka, 100 kilos of you-know-what, and 25 airplanes. Think long and hard before answering.”

Zelenskiy: “OK, OK, deal. I see if I can’t make something up about Biden. Maybe there’s something.”