The most powerful man in the world has decided to take a warped approach to tackling his two biggest nemesis, Obama and weak children.
As we close in on the most consequential election of our lifetimes, either you stand against Trump and his evil GOP or you don’t. And if you don’t, well …
With lives literally on the line, Donald Trump has been displaying a dynamic brand of leadership never before seen literally anywhere — ever. I mean, EVER.
Donald Trump used his Presidents Day letter to eviscerate the presidents who came before him, including Lincoln who freed the slaves, and gave us Obama.
Because I have been busy guarding Alabama from hurricanes, striking fear into the Taliban, and dealing with the awful, no-nothing, Secretary of the Exteriors Michael Bolton, I have not written you a Very Important Letter in two weeks.
Many, many people have told me that blowing up hurricanes with nuclear bombs is a brilliant idea, and that they can’t believe I could possibly even come up with it. So in the future when we are blowing up hurricanes with nuclear bombs, you can remember who never said it first but could have if he wanted.
Hell, damn near everybody likes Joe. He’s like the friendly neighbor up the street who always keeps his yard clean, waves as you walk by and is a helluva Little League coach. I respect Joe. He has spent his life as a public servant and while he has been on the wrong end of some pretty consequential calls in my opinion, I never questioned his heart or love of this country.
Those last two qualities right there should have disqualified Trump four decades ago.
And listen, Americans, my God, Vlad assured me in Helsinki they had nothing to do with our elections. I told everybody this in a powerful speech I gave while I was over there in Norway. That should have been the end of it right there. But, no, the lying, stinking, fake media had to keep reporting about it so that Mueller wouldn’t ejaculate me.
Now we are holding our breath and tapping our feet, while Trump continues to burn it all down. He doesn’t follow laws, he eviscerates them. He doesn’t tell the truth, he batters it. He doesn’t love this country, he loathes it. It is time to impeach this awful man.